Tuesday, 09 October 2007

Parents – get a better strategy when talking to your kids!

If as a parent you want your kids or any other kid, especially yours to respect you – you need to find a better strategy to talk to them than the one you are currently using.

It is no wonder they don’t take you seriously whenever you talk. And instead of listening to your shouting and nagging – they would rather leave you talking to yourself, or backchat you or even worse just keep quite. Is that how you want to raise them?

Yes it can not be disputed that you are their parent. But still. That doesn’t give you the right to talk to them whenever and however you want to. They are just kinds after all.

I have been observing a mother who has two kids over a year now. The elder is a 19-year old boy and 12 or 13 year-old girl. ‘K’ – their mother, has no proper strategy when talking to her kids.

Instead of talking sitting down with the children and talk to them like a real mother should – she just go around shouting and this has led to the children disrespecting her and not even listen to what she’s saying whenever she shouts.

I then intervened as a young man as I realized that this had gone too far. Not for my sake or hers but the kids’ too.

“That is not how you talk to your kids,” I said. A parent, especially, needs to sit down with the children and talk to them in a civilized manner and give them the opportunity to explain why they do things the way they do.

Having grown up in a village and raised by a ‘used-to-be’ strict uncle, I realized how fortunate I was having been raised the way I was.

If you are a parent and your children are not listening to you as you want them to, your approach could be the problem. “If you were talking to them in a better way than the one you are using right now and they won’t listen to you – I would then know they have a problem and not you. But they way you are going on about this right now, I think you are the problem,” I said to ‘k’

Children need to be talked to in a proper way and be given the respect they deserve. Just because you were raised ‘roughly’ – it doesn’t mean you have to raise your children the same way too.

Just find a good strategy and you will realize how your relationship with your children will be from now onwards. Yes, a good strategy it is. Just like that!

No comments: